Who is REDD? Take a quick look at what a REDD Agent is and peek into the personality of REDD herself.
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Vince Carter, Dallas Mavericks, The Michael Scott Paper Company, Clamored, Paul Reiser, Todd, Juli, Tiffany, The Moth Woman, Shaniel makes better fried rice than me, Terry has light to spread, REDD has a poster.
In overtime. In Charlotte watching the Mavs play the Bobcats. Great game. Tonight I'm understanding a lot of what it means to play under pressure. Watching marketing, publicity, and promotion in action. Witnessing showmanship applied. And getting a feel for what needs to be done to play hard and win a game.
First I want to apologize for this blog. I wanted it to be about my adventures in movie making But it's become a blog where I post cryptically about my emotional state as I experience my different supposed traumas.
And it seems there is so much that I go through that I cannot explain or talk about fully. And here comes more.
Because of recent events I go through bouts of sadness, loneliness, and fear. Who doesn't?
But I do try to remember that I am blessed and lucky and I have alot going for me. That only comes through me fighting to get to that stability where I can focus on that.
But there are many times, very many times, where I do get a sign, a symbol, a voice from above that tells me it's all going to be beyond OK. It says to me that things are going to be amazing. And from past experience I should have learned by now to trust in the process. I've seen what happens when I follow my passion, my positivity, and my vision. I've seen what happens when I pay attention to the signs.
Thing is, I'm stupid. I need to be hit over the head with these signs and I usually am. The universe practically screams at me these affirmations of life and the future and each time I find myself amazed and flabbergasted by what I had just witnessed only to slip back into whatever negativity I was experiencing.
I really need to cut that shit out.
Bottom line is I'm dumb. I have greatness before me and it takes a punch to my face to show me that I have it. I need to really pay attention, and really believe. REALLY BELIEVE. This life has been generous with all the signs and symbols it throws at me, overtly generous, and I need to work hard to remember these signs and use them as inspiration to further drive me towards the person I was born to be and to experience those moments of amazement I need to and deserve to experience.
The truth is I am experiencing exactly what I asked for. Exactly what I created. I may not always remember that it's happening, but this is exactly what I ordered. With that in mind it's those signs, those symbols that I need to look to help push me towards that ultimate vision I have.
Ok, here are a few reminders. Since I want to kinda remember the most recent punch to the face I received.
I need to learn to absorb what I've learned, because here's the thing, I have to deal with this myself.
It's the truth and it's a privilege.
All that other negativity that pushes you down? Ain't nobody got time for that.
1) Life does not operate on reality but on the perception of reality. That includes all perceived realities from everyone, including yourself, and the people around you. Reality can be changed by changing people's perception. People's perception cannot be changed until you change your own perception first.
2) Always remember what it is you are working towards. The shadows will always try to pull your focus to the stagnant and the unproductive. Look to the light and always remember the power of that vision. It's as important as you think it is. Even on days where it doesn't seem like it, you have to be a rock about this.
3) You have to focus on your goals, but you have to be conscious of others, their needs, their pain. Always ask yourself what you can do to help them or more importantly what it is you can stop doing that would help them. Help people without losing your focus, help people.
2. More useful, suitable, or desirable: found a better way to go; a suit with a better fit than that one.
3. More highly skilled or adept: I am better at math than English.
4. Greater or larger: argued for the better part of an hour.
5. More advantageous or favorable; improved: a better chance of success.
6. Healthier or more fit than before: The patient is better today.
I've been fast tracked through a course in confidence, emotional maturity, time management, and creative thinking. My eyes have been opened to new possibilities.
Because of the events of the past week I can say things are better in certain aspects of my life. But now I'm starting to see how other parts of my existence and especially my creative endeavors can greatly improve.
It has to happen every so often. You realize after seeing something fall a part how you can put it all back together and in even better shape. This becomes even more obvious when other people don't see what you see.
I made something and now that I look at it I'm seeing how awful it is. Well, not awful, but satisfactory. And for me satisfactory is awful. I don't want to create on a level that is just plain, acceptable, or average. I want to and can do better.
I'm sick of average. And so I go to work on greater things.
You have to do everything humanly possible to stay extremely positive and confident.
EVERYTHING HUMANLY POSSIBLE.
I emphasize this because I was witness to the very results of being positive and confident. Some very good results. Confirmed by the universe I might add. But it is a tough thing to accomplish. Even after being convinced of the power of positive thinking and a confident spirit, I still struggle to stay in such a mood. It does indeed take work.
The key here is to get to a point where you truly believe in yourself and in your power. Even in cases where people may think you're a fool. You've got to say "Fuck Em!" It's not about anyone else's beliefs but your own. This is your life, your situation, your time, your existence, your dreams, your goals. Believe in them.
Believe in yourself. Find a way to be confident. Even in failure. Recognize that your failure is not the end of you. And as long as you still exist, then you still have every opportunity, every possibility to come out on top.
Confidence is believing in yourself. Truly believing in yourself.
You'll have doubts of course. Without doubts you cannot possibly reach the true strength of your belief. You have to go through those troubles in order to fully understand and experience confidence. How else can you truly know the feeling of comfort without experiencing the pain. How can you fully understand calm if you have no reference of what turmoil is.
You will need to do this several times before you reach full confidence. And even after then you'll still experience doubts. But just like a muscle, the more you work it out, the more you damage those fibers, the stronger it re-builds itself to be.
If you need a starting point then just follow this quote from The West Wing. In a scene from the episode titled "In The Shadow Of Two Gunmen" President Bartlet doesn't have alot of Faith in himself, but his friend Leo McGarry does. Leo tells him this:
"Act as if ye have faith and faith shall be given to you. Put it another way, fake it till you make it."
Gather around kids I'm about to school ya. Here's an important lesson that I was reminded of these past few days. It's simple but valuable, so listen close.
Confidence is key.
That's it. All done. Here endeth the lesson.
I'll elaborate more on that later.
"You just fulfilled the first rule of law enforcement. When your shift is over make sure you go home alive."
Need to take advantage of this, really get into getting some work done. See how I can move forward while I've got the advantage coming.
I've been lazy (by my standards) and I really need to push things while keeping things cool and calm. Zen on a mission.
I've been inching. But now it's time to stand apart. See if I can make some strides.
So in order for me to really get stuff done I need to ask myself some questions.
1) Is everything organized to operate to it's full potential and efficiency? And that's everything. The workspace. Office space. The computer files on the hard drive.
2) Is there anything you can get rid of? Is there anything you can clear out to make more room?
3) Are you doing everything you can to earn what you can to help supplement what you already have?
4) Less is more. What are you doing to apply that rule?
5) Are there any habits you have developed that are wasteful, especially ones that you may not realize are wasteful?
6) Are you getting enough sleep?
7) Are you doing anything that is a reaction from worry or fear? If so, cut that shit out.
8) Is your presentation the best it can be? Are your websites, pages, social networks, in order? Is it efficient? Is it easy for people to access? Are they ready for distribution and sales? Are they ready for marketing? Like REALLY ready?
9) Are you communicating enough with your audience? With your backers? With your network? With your fans? With your potential fans?
10) Are you getting enough sleep?
11) Are you paying proper attention to each project? Really paying PROPER attention? If not, you need to cut something.
12) What are you doing to make sure what you are making is something special? What is it that is going to make them stand apart from the norm? If you're doing nothing about this then there is no point in even trying to make movies.
It would be easy for me to be preoccupied with my current situation. I'm waiting on some news. Potentially great news, and if not great, then just plain ok news.
Regardless of what the news is there is still plenty of work for me to do. So my goal is to get as much work done as humanly possible. And when the news comes, we'll play it by ear.
None of this changes the fact that I still have two movies and a web series to produce.
Still working on REDD. Still working on Saturday Night Fright. And I've got an episode of Monster Cops to get out in the next few weeks.
The issue I'm having to work through with both REDD and MC is in the writing. I'm trying to best understand how to tell these particular stories just right, and that's mainly what I'll be working on.
Check out the latest Monster Cops Clip. This is just a quick snippet from the next episode called MONSTER COPS: VAMPIRE KILLERS
I have this annoying habit where I find the interesting, enjoyable, and sometimes magical details in ordinary everyday moments.
It's annoying because these moments seem so trivial to others, if I were to point out what was so special about it people would just look at me weird. So I have to keep it to myself.
But its ok. Sometimes holding on to that secret just makes the moment that more special.
Today was definitely one of those days where I experience those moments.
What have I learned today?
I'm a rule breaker. Or at the very least a major rule bender.
